25~ Looking back on your life...who taught you the most about what love is/isn't?

Damn...when I saw this question, I figured it would be easy because it takes the focus off of me and puts it on someone else in my life, sort of.  But now, I'm at a loss.

I didn't have the easiest childhood.  I mean, I had and did more than most kids my age (went on 3 cruises to Nassau, the Virgin Islands, Puerto Rico, went to 2 World's Fairs...do they even have those anymore...had a car at 16, blah blah blah, siss boom bah, etc) but as far as being shown love, my dad was and is the staple for that and even he had a kind of a warped way about it.  My mom?  Forget about it.  We had a love/hate relationship that I still think about to this day and she's been gone 12 years come next month.

I had boyfriends (as you know, I was with my first one for 5 years) and husbands and I found myself sometimes sabotaging relationships because I didn't know what love truly was.

So I don't know if anyone really showed me what love was.  Hell, I may not even know what it is now.  I do know what it's not and honestly, after all I've gone through these past couple of weeks, I REALLY know what it isn't.

*Sorry this blog isn't up to snuff.  Not really feeling like writing about love right now.  I think Adam Sandler sang it best...